New School, New Country, New Outlook

This August, I moved from the U.S to the Persian Gulf on account of my dad getting a new job. I packed all my bags, said goodbye to almost everyone I've known all my life, and offically started my journey. These last 30 or so days have been completely and utterly wild; the strangest I've ever known. Three days after landing, I had to start my first day at my new school, and make an entirely new life for myself. Luckily and unexpectedly, I made friends quite quickly and have been invited to the mall a few times, where we ate at Shake Shack - which felt a little like home - and went into this amazing "snow dune," which felt nothing like home. The "snow dune" is this incredible indoor snow park that had tons of different things to do. There was snow all over the floor - made by snow machines - and it was freezing cold, so we had to wear snowsuits given to us as we entered. Then we went tubing down slides, we rode bumper cars, rope climbed, and more. And yes, all of this was in a shopping mall with stores like American Eagle. It just had theme parks. I'd never seen or even heard about anything like this in my life.

While all of this is exciting and exhilarating, it is also so alien and frightening. Nobody here knows I have medical problems (aside from my teachers), and for the most part, I want it to stay that way until I build a proper foundation of trust between me and my friends. This means that I will have to be pretty careful when going to sleepovers, and I'll need to watch my medical supplies and make sure they remain hidden. Sleepovers have always been a tough thing for me. I need to bring several plastic bags with me for my supplies, along with an extra bag so that I don't litter their bathrooms with my used implements. All of this has to be concealed in my overnight bag, which I always have to take with me to and from the bathroom. On top of all that, I have to remain in the bathroom for relatively long periods of time to commit to my regimen, which is a huge drag. I can't imagine my friends aren't thinking, "What is she doing in there?"

Quite frankly, going to all of these measures to remain secretive can be exhausting, but it's important for my dignity. Until I know someone well enough to share more about my condition, I will continue doing this. That being said, what I don't want to do is have a lot of stress and anxitey about people finding out. I decided this year that I was not going to fret about that aspect of my life, like I usually do, and would try my best to just make firends and see what happens. Of course, my medical condition isn't the only, or even the hardest part about making a move like this in my senior year of High School. I've felt a constant pang of homesickness and I miss my friends. I am proud of the fact that I have made new friends and that it gets a little easier every day.

Since we're on the subject of homesickness, I'd say that has definitely been the most challenging part of adapting. There is not an hour that goes by where I don't reminisce about where I grew up. It kills me that I'm not in my childhood home right now, and that I cannot perform my little weekly rituals like drivng to my favorite Chinese restaurant and getting take-out on a Saturday night, or going downtown with my friends. Things I thought I'd be doing a lot in my senior year. I miss things I genuinely loved to do, but I also miss things that I took for granted. I am trying hard not to let the discomfort of change swallow me whole because it was bound to happen in the near future - like when I go to college. Despite all the stress and hardship this experience is bringing into my life, I know that it's doing me a gigantic favor. It's an investment in my future, and I know that I will make unforgettable memories here. My mission right now is to perk myself up, take in the sights, smells, and tastes, and most importantly not let issues like my health (or simply my common, everyday insecurities) haunt me.